For Little to No Gain
A common thread between all of my favorite shows is the impact of our choices. The traps we lay for ourselves. The paths in life that we go down. The things we cannot redo, cannot re-learn, cannot replace. The paths you cannot return down.
Mike Ehrmantraut rues his past as a dirty cop. He knows he can never overcome his past mistakes, the loss he caused. He comes to terms with it in a succinct: “We all make our choices.”
Jimmy McGill asks about a time machine – what would you go back and change if you could? Walt, in possibly his crankiest form, reminds him “You are not talking about a time machine, you are talking about regrets.”
Chuck, in what may be a cry for connection to Jimmy, or a reflection on his own failures in relationships emphasizes that “If you don’t like where you’re going, there’s no shame in changing our paths.”
Avon Barksdale, holding court over his incapacitated brother, muses on the ramifications of one moment in our lives: “See, the thing is, you only got to fuck up once. Be a little slow, be a little late. And how you ain’t never gonna be slow? Never be late?… it’s life.”
Regrets. Pride. Control. These men connect across a theme. We are creatures of our own choices, not circumstance, not luck. Our choices, our pride, our decisions, are all linked and we will never understand those linkages as best as we try. We think we understand these things, that we can control and change our timeline, our past. That we know our set paths. But life humbles you. Your choices humble you.
You pay for your pride. You pay for your inability to be open with yourself and others. You pay for the fear of choosing another path and what is beyond it. Avon, Jimmy, Walt, Mike – all prisoners of their choices and their pride. All bound by decisions and pathways they cannot return to, cannot make up for. Just like all of us.

Leave a comment